8 Qualities of Mindfulness
Self Compassion/Compassion
In order to be truly kind to others, you first have to be truly kind to yourself.
To be truly kind to yourself requires self compassion.
Compassion is recognizing suffering in others and feeling the emotional response.
Self Compassion is recognizing your own suffering and feeling your own emotional response; cultivating love for yourself as you are, without self blame or criticism.
Non- judgement
When we first start paying attention to what is going on in our minds, we discover that almost everything is a judgement of one kind or another. Our judgments colour all of our interactions. Suspending judging, there is no need to judge our judging mind, or to change it; just become aware of it. Over time, this awareness allows you to see your thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations just as they; without the distortions and misconceptions we all add to them. Simply ask yourself, “what is this”?
Acceptance
Acceptance is recognizing how things are, and finding ways to be in a wise relationship with them. Appropriate action will follow from your own clarity of vision. Acceptance has nothing to do with passive resignation. Acceptance gives you a place to stand. If you do not see and accept things as they are, you cannot know how to act and take effective appropriate action to deal with reality.
Non Striving
Mindfulness meditation is not like anything else you have ever taken on. It is not a skill you practice with some ultimate
goal in mind, like learning to drive a car. The agenda/ the purpose/ that goal is simply to become present in the moment. Not focusing on how to get from A to B, but simply to focus on being here at the A.
Letting go/ Letting be
Becoming the impartial observer allows us to distance ourselves from holding on to whatever we desire, or pushing away anything we don’t desire. We create non- attachment to outcome; not holding on to what we want, not clinging to what we hate, and not clinging to what we have. It allows whatever arises to just be, and in its own time pass through our lives. When we get stuck saying, “this cannot be happening” or “things have to happen this way”, mindfulness can allow us to say “perhaps things will happen this way or that way, let’s wait and see”.
Patience
We are always trying to get somewhere else. To find some better moment or some better time when we have it all together. This prevents us from being in this moment. Patience is being in this moment, and appreciating the gifts present in this moment. e.g. A child may want to make a butterfly come out of the chrysalis because it would be nice to have a butterfly right away. The chrysalis is then innocently peeled apart by the child without an understanding that this process unfolds naturally in its own time. Rushing it will sadly kill the butterfly.
Curiosity/ Beginner’s mind
Too often, we see our world through a scratched & cloudy lense; or filter of experience from our conditioned opinions, ideas, and judgements. Consequently, we only see half the picture which is often distorted or obscured. Curiosity allows us to see things through child-like eyes, observing as if for the very first time.
Trust
Can we trust that no matter what happens, we have the ability to handle it?
Can we trust that sometimes even when we do not have the answers, or even know the questions, that that is okay?
Is there a sense that there is much more right with our lives than is wrong with our lives….no matter what is wrong?
Note:
Your practice is a process of discovery and exploration rather than one of judgment and evaluation. Developing clear-sightedness is not always enjoyable, as we develop self awareness of all areas of our self