For optimal health, one needs to develop self-awareness, have clear health goals, a willingness to make necessary changes and an attitude of openness, acceptance and gratitude. In the previous installment, the importance of stress management was highlighted. Responding to challenges with equanimity and creative problem solving promotes mental, physical and spiritual health. The concept of mindfulness is an essential attitude to achieve these goals.
Mindfulness, an eastern philosophy for thousands of years, has become increasingly accepted and promoted in western society for the past few decades.
Mindfulness is defined as non-judgmental, moment-by-moment awareness. There are many benefits to mindfulness. The more one can be fully present moment by moment with an open, accepting attitude, the more energy is available for fully experiencing life with less suffering. I will expand on mindful principles and practice in this and the next few installments.
The seven main attitudes that help one to achieve mindfulness are: non-judgment, acceptance, patience, curiosity (beginner’s mind), trust, non-striving and letting go (non-attachment). This installment will focus on non-judgmental acceptance, the core attitude of mindfulness.
We are constantly filtering our experiences with judgments. We judge ourselves, other people, relationships, careers, economic status -the list is endless. We check our experiences against our unconscious list of expectations that we have accumulated. When we find a discrepancy between our expectation and our reality, we get upset or “off-center”. This causes a release of stress hormones, which adds to a stressful situation by clouding our ability to think clearly. If we can simply accept a situation without adding a layer of judgment, we can reduce the stress response. This encourages calmness, allowing the problem-solving, solution-focused part of our brain to be in the driver’s seat.
An attitude of acceptance is also intimately related to being mindful. We need to accept what is happening to us in any given moment because that particular experience is already here! Acceptance facilitates full moment-by-moment presence.
It needs to be emphasized that non-judgmental acceptance is not the same as passivity. Discernment is important. For example, if one is in an abusive relationship at home or work, one needs to accept the reality that the relationship is harmful and make necessary changes. Mindfulness enables us to have the clarity to problem-solve effectively.
Mindful Exercise: Cultivate your mindful observer in as many situations as possible. Notice any judgments or non-acceptance that arises. See if you can be less judgmental and more accepting, especially in unpleasant circumstances. Notice if this helps you to be more calm and solution-oriented. Some find it helpful to frequently ask oneself: “Am I fully present?” “Am I here now?” Develop your own short word or phrase that reminds you to practice moment-by-moment non-judgmental acceptance.