Prior musings have outlined a method of optimizing physical, mental and spiritual health by focusing on self-care and embracing the mindful attitudes of non-judgmental acceptance, patience, curiosity, trust, non-striving,letting go and kindness.
This musing will address the benefits of giving yourself permission to live a more healthy, balanced life. Our modern society promotes a hyper-busy, multitasking, distracted existence. We seem to have endless “to do” lists, while texting, checking news feeds, Twitter, FaceBook, email accounts, YouTube videos,etc. Add work, household chores,family and community events, etcetera, no wonder many of us feel we are on frenetic treadmill. This is a recipe for burnout, illness and all the physical and emotional symptoms that arise from chronic stress.
Why do we stay on this obviously unhealthy, over-busy treadmill? The three common reasons are lack of awareness, self expectation (conditioning) and societal pressures.
Mindfulness promotes awareness. As we engage in formal meditation or go about our daily tasks with full mindful presence, we can discern how we are feeling in mind, body and spirit. We may discover that we are feeling tired,dispirited, overwhelmed or resentful about all the responsibilty and busyness of our lives. When we are aware, we have choices.
We can hold up an honest mirror and reflect on our habitual busy behaviour.
We may hear our internal dialogue, often the voice of childhood conditioning, that insists that we are valuable only when we are doing something. Our inner critical voice may provide unfriendly reminders that we are not good enough, need to strive harder, give more. Mindful awareness of our personal “itty bitty sh..ty committee” allows us to acknowledge and thank the inner critic’s wish to motivate us. Evidence shows that a kind, supportive inner coach is much more effective at giving ourselves permission to be less busy, making time for rest and self-nourishment. We need to be OK with saying “no” as a complete sentence when we are at our capacity and asked to do more.
The third reason for staying on the over busy treadmill is comparing ourselves to others. Comparison adds to our stress. It is healthier to live at a pace that works for us, not based on societal and peer pressures. It takes courage and mindful awareness to stand firm in our own shoes and not be pressured into being too busy. Sometimes we take pride in being overly busy as a badge of honour or importance. Our worth needs to be based on simply being human, not how busy we are. Remember, we are human be-ings, not do-ings ! It is healthier to leave space for unexpected events and spontaneity rather than running an over-crowded schedue.
Benefits include being calmer, more present, joyful, creative and better able to meaningfully connect with others. Emotional regulation, sleep, energy , concentration and wise decision-making can be enhanced by moving toward a less frenetic, more balanced existence.
Mindful Home Practice:
Consider conducting regular honest,mindful reviews of your daily, weekly and monthly schedules. Is your pace working for you? Can your obligations be reduced to make more room for spontaneity or unexpected extra tasks? Stress can be greatly reduced and flexibility increased by simplifying and remembering to plan without being overly attached to outcome. Notice if you gradually allow yourself more time for self care and stress management!
Please visit www.managestress.ca for more information.